Marriage, Adultery and Divorce

By Isaac Aluochier


All scriptural references are from the World English Bible available at http://www.ebible.org/bible/WEB/.


CONTENTS

  1. Strong's Definitions 
  2. Penalty For Committing Adultery
  3. Adulterers Rebel Against The Light
  4. Adulterers Have No Right To Declare Yahweh's Statutes
  5. Committing Adultery Is Destroying One's Soul
  6. Children Of Disobedience
  7. Worshipping Any Entity Other Than Yahweh Is Idolatry And Spiritual Adultery
  8. Lusting After A Woman
  9. [August 1999 View: Lusting After A Woman.
  10. How A Man Commits Adultery
  11. [August 1999 View: How A Man Commits Adultery.
  12. Is A Validly Divorced Woman Allowed To Remarry?
  13. [August 1999 View: Is A Validly Divorced Woman Allowed To Remarry?
  14. Why Adultery Is Deterred Against
  15. Human Marriage Typifies The Messiah's And His Assembly's Marriage
  16. Spiritual Oneness In The Messiah's Assembly
  17. Rebels Cast Out From The Messiah's Assembly
  18. Why Adultery Is Wrong
  19. There Is Only One Approved Spiritual Husband
  20. [August 1999 View: Why Adultery Is Deterred Against.
  21. Can A Husband Annul The Divorce Of His Wife?
  22. [August 1999 View: Can A Husband Annul The Divorce Of His Wife?
  23. A Man Can Marry Again A Woman Previously His Wife
  24. Yahweh Will Marry His Former Wife, The House Of Israel
  25. Why Divorce Is Permanent
  26. [August 1999 View: Why Divorce Is Permanent.
  27. Why Yahweh Will Remarry The House Of Israel
  28. Can A Man Remarry A Woman Sexually Defiled While Divorced From Him?
  29. Things That Defile Men
  30. Allowable Ground For Divorce
  31. How A Man Commits Adultery In The Spirit
  32. Can A Wife Divorce Her Husband?
  33. Does The Wife Who Separates Herself From Her Husband, Yet Does Not Remarry, Commit Adultery?
  34. Why Adulterers And Adulteresses Are Not Allowed To Marry Again
  35. [August 1999 View: Why Adulterers And Adulteress Are Not Allowed To Marry Again.
  36. How The Law Against Adultery Impacts On Polygyny
  37. How A Woman Commits Adultery
  38. The Unrighteous Include Adulterers
  39. The Works Of The Flesh
  40. Sex Within Marriage Is Holy
  41. James Addresses Those Committing Adultery
  42. Desiring An Additional Wife To Gratify One’s Pleasures
  43. Repenting Of Adultery
  44. Patience In Marriage
  45. Being Unmarried
  46. Compounded Difficulties Within Polygyny In Service To Yahweh

 


Strong's Definitions 


Penalty For Committing Adultery

Leviticus 20:10 reads,

20:10The man who commits adultery with another man’s wife, even he who commits adultery with his neighbor’s wife, the adulterer and the adulteress shall surely be put to death.

The penalty for committing adultery, both for the man and the wayward wife, is death.

Adulterers Rebel Against The Light

Job 24:13-17 reads,

24:13"These are of those who rebel against the light;
They don’t know the ways of it,
Nor abide in the paths of it.

24:14The murderer rises with the light.
He kills the poor and needy.
In the night he is like a thief.

24:15The eye also of the adulterer waits for the twilight,
Saying, ‘No eye shall see me.’
He disguises his face.

24:16In the dark they dig through houses.
They shut themselves up in the daytime.
They don’t know the light.

24:17For the morning is to all of them like thick darkness,
For they know the terrors of the thick darkness.

Among those who rebel against the light, who do not know its ways, nor abide in its paths, are murderers and adulterers.

Adulterers Have No Right To Declare Yahweh's Statutes

Psalm 50:16-23 reads,

50:16But to the wicked God says,
"What right do you have to declare my statutes,
That you have taken my covenant on your lips,
50:17Seeing you hate instruction,
And throw my words behind you?

50:18When you saw a thief, you consented with him,
And have participated with adulterers.

50:19"You give your mouth to evil.
You harnesses your tongue for deceit.

50:20You sit and speak against your brother.
You slander your own mother’s son.

50:21You have done these things, and I kept silent.
You thought that the "I AM" was just like you.
I will rebuke you, and accuse you in front of your eyes.

50:22"Now consider this, you who forget God,
Lest I tear you into pieces, and there be none to deliver.

50:23Whoever offers the sacrifice of thanksgiving glorifies me,
And prepares his way so that I will show God’s salvation to him."

The wicked, who include those who hate instruction, those who cast Yahweh’s words behind them, those who consent with those who violate Yahweh’s law, those who are partakers with adulterers, who give their mouths to evil, and frame deceit with their tongues, who speak against their brethren and slander them, have no right to declare Yahweh’s statutes or to take his covenant in their mouths!

If polygyny is adultery then those engaged in polygyny have no right to declare Yahweh’s statutes or to take his covenant in their mouths. If polygyny is adultery then those engaged in it must desist from it before they can have a right to declare Yahweh’s statutes or to take his covenant in their mouths.

Nevertheless, the scriptural evidence shows that there were some polygynous men, including David, who did indeed declare Yahweh’s statutes and took his covenant in their mouths. It therefore appears, from scriptural evidence, that engaging in polygyny is not engaging in adultery.

Committing Adultery Is Destroying One's Soul

Proverbs 6:30-35 reads,

6:30Men don’t despise a thief,
If he steals to satisfy himself when he is hungry:

6:31But if he be found, he shall restore seven times.
He shall give all the wealth of his house.

6:32He who commits adultery with a woman is void of understanding.
He who does it destroys his own soul
.

6:33He will get wounds and dishonor.
His reproach will not be wiped away.

6:34For jealousy arouses the fury of the husband.
He won’t spare in the day of vengeance.

6:35He won’t regard any ransom,
Neither will he rest content, though you give many gifts.

Those who commit adultery lack understanding, and destroy their souls.

Children Of Disobedience

Isaiah 57:3-13 reads,

57:3But draw near here, you sons of the sorceress, the seed of the adulterer and the prostitute. 57:4Against whom do you sport yourselves? Against whom make you a wide mouth, and put out the tongue? Aren’t you children of disobedience, a seed of falsehood, 57:5you who inflame yourselves among the oaks, under every green tree; who kill the children in the valleys, under the clefts of the rocks? 57:6Among the smooth stones of the valley is your portion; they, they are your lot; even to them have you poured a drink-offering, you have offered an offering. Shall I be appeased for these things? 57:7On a high and lofty mountain have you set your bed; there also you went up to offer sacrifice. 57:8Behind the doors and the posts have you set up your memorial: for you have uncovered yourself to another than me, and are gone up; you have enlarged your bed, and made you a covenant with them: you loved their bed where you saw it. 57:9You went to the king with oil, and did increase your perfumes, and did send your ambassadors far off, and did debase yourself even to Sheol. 57:10You were wearied with the length of your way; yet you didn’t say, It is in vain: you found a reviving of your strength; therefore you weren’t faint. 57:11Of whom have you been afraid and in fear, that you lie, and have not remembered me, nor laid it to your heart? Haven’t I held my peace even of long time, and you don’t fear me? 57:12I will declare your righteousness; and as for your works, they shall not profit you. 57:13When you cry, let those who you have gathered deliver you; but the wind shall take them, a breath shall carry them all away: but he who takes refuge in me shall possess the land, and shall inherit my holy mountain.

Offspring of the adulterer and the harlot are termed children of transgression, offspring of falsehood.

Those who give themselves over to a deity other than Yahweh commit spiritual adultery. Spiritual adultery is therefore the worship of any entity that is not Yahweh. (Is not this equated with covetousness in other portions of scripture? Wrongful worship is wrong desire of that which does not and cannot rightfully belong to one, and therefore also violates the law against covetousness.)

Worshipping Any Entity Other Than Yahweh Is Idolatry And Spiritual Adultery

Ezekiel 23:36-49 reads,

23:36Yahweh said moreover to me: Son of man, will you judge Oholah and Oholibah? Then declare to them their abominations. 23:37For they have committed adultery, and blood is in their hands; and with their idols have they committed adultery; and they have also caused their sons, whom they bore to me, to pass through the fire to them to be devoured. 23:38Moreover this they have done to me: they have defiled my sanctuary in the same day, and have profaned my Sabbaths. 23:39For when they had slain their children to their idols, then they came the same day into my sanctuary to profane it; and, behold, thus have they done in the midst of my house. 23:40Furthermore you have sent for men who come from far, to whom a messenger was sent, and, behold, they came; for whom you did wash yourself, paint your eyes, and deck yourself with ornaments, 23:41and sit on a stately bed, with a table prepared before it, whereupon you did set my incense and my oil. 23:42The voice of a multitude being at ease was with her: and with men of the common sort were brought drunkards from the wilderness; and they put bracelets on the hands of them twain, and beautiful crowns on their heads. 23:43Then said I of her who was old in adulteries, Now will they play the prostitute with her, and she with them. 23:44They went in to her, as they go in to a prostitute: so went they in to Oholah and to Oholibah, the lewd women. 23:45Righteous men, they shall judge them with the judgment of adulteresses, and with the judgment of women who shed blood; because they are adulteresses, and blood is in their hands. 23:46For thus says the Lord Yahweh: I will bring up a company against them, and will give them to be tossed back and forth and robbed. 23:47The company shall stone them with stones, and dispatch them with their swords; they shall kill their sons and their daughters, and burn up their houses with fire. 23:48Thus will I cause lewdness to cease out of the land, that all women may be taught not to do after your lewdness. 23:49They shall recompense your lewdness on you, and you shall bear the sins of your idols; and you shall know that I am the Lord Yahweh.

The worship of deities other than Yahweh is idolatry and spiritual adultery. For spiritually we are married to Yahweh, and our sole master should be Yahweh and not some other deity.

The penalty for committing adultery, both physical and spiritual, is death. Spiritual adultery is punishable by spiritual death - for eternity.

It should be noted that Yahweh punishes adulteresses that other women may learn not to practice adulteries. Implying that the inflicting of a judgement serves to teach those witnessing the judgement.

Lusting After A Woman

Matthew 5:27-32 reads,

5:27"You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery;’ 5:28but I tell you that everyone who gazes at a woman to lust after her has committed adultery with her already in his heart. 5:29If your right eye causes you to stumble, pluck it out and cast it from you. For it is profitable for you that one of your members should perish, than for your whole body to be cast into Gehenna. 5:30If your right hand causes you to stumble, cut it off, and cast it from you: for it is profitable for you that one of your members should perish, and not your whole body be cast into Gehenna.

5:31"It was also said, ‘Whoever shall put away his wife, let him give her a writing of divorce,’ 5:32but I tell you that whoever who puts away his wife, except for the cause of sexual immorality, makes her an adulteress; and whoever marries her when she is put away commits adultery.

A man lusting after a woman is already committing adultery with her in his heart.

How?

For he desires her only for his sexual gratification, only for his own pleasure. If he is living only for his pleasure, he is placing his pleasure paramount in his life, and by so doing, he is displacing Yahweh from being paramount in his life. This is spiritual adultery, serving another entity rather than serving Yahweh, and is also idolatry and covetousness.

Therefore, if a man desires a woman, it should be for more than just his sexual gratification, his own pleasure. And his desire for her must not be greater than his service to Yahweh. And the purpose of his desire for her must be within the bounds of Yahweh’s will, otherwise he will be displacing his service to Yahweh with his service to this purpose contrary to the will of Yahweh, thereby committing spiritual adultery and idolatry.

Likewise, a woman should not lust after a man, for this too is spiritual adultery, placing the fulfilment of one’s pleasure above service to Yahweh. A woman should desire a man for a purpose consistent with Yahweh’s will.

[August 1999 View: Lusting After A Woman.

It should also be noted that the only woman that a man can commit adultery with in his heart is one who is someone else's wife. For adultery must involve the wife of another man.]

How A Man Commits Adultery

How does the man who divorces his wife for a reason other than her committing of sexual immorality cause her to commit adultery?

The divorced wife, like other human beings, will need to have her sexual desires gratified. She is therefore likely to seek this sexual gratification from some man. As, in front of Yahweh, she is not really divorced from her husband, still being considered by Yahweh as the man’s wife, if she sexually lies with another man she will have committed adultery. And as she needs to have her sexual desires gratified, she is likely to so commit adultery. Therefore, her husband, who placed her in this state whereby she is likely to commit adultery, also shares in her adultery.

Also, a man who marries a woman who is divorced on a ground that was not adultery also commits adultery, for the woman is, in reality before Yahweh, not divorced, but still the wife of her husband from whom she is separated.

[August 1999 View: How A Man Commits Adultery.

There is a distinction between 'divorce' and 'putting away'. Divorce involves a man giving his wife a bill of divorce and sending her out of his house. It always involves putting away. But putting away need not involve divorce. For a woman can be put away from her husband without him giving her a bill of divorce.

The woman who has been put away, yet not divorced, is still her husband's wife. She is not allowed to marry again. Therefore, if she has sex with another man she commits adultery. The woman who has been divorced can marrying another man, for Deuteronomy 24:1-2 allows her to be so married again.]

Is A Validly Divorced Woman Allowed To Remarry?

Is a woman validly divorced allowed to remarry?

The wording of Yah'shuah’s words as quoted here clearly state that she is not!

If she was allowed to remarry, then there would be absolutely no deterrent against adultery! For an unsubmissive wife, desirous of departing from being under the authority of her husband, would simply become adulterous in an effort to get her husband to divorce her. For this is the only allowed ground for her husband divorcing her. Once divorced she would then claim that she could validly marry anyone of her choice, even the man she had been committing adultery with, if her adulterous conduct was engaged in with only one man.

If this was so, then where would the deterrent against adultery be? There would be absolutely no deterrent!

[August 1999 View: Is A Validly Divorced Woman Allowed To Remarry?

Yah'shuah was careful in his choice of words. The words Yah'shuah used should be translated into English as 'put away' rather than divorce. What Yah'shuah forbade was a woman put away from her husband without being divorced from him marrying another man. For she is still the wife the her husband who has not yet divorced him.

Matthew 5:17-19 reads,

5:17"Don’t think that I came to destroy the law or the prophets. I didn’t come to destroy, but to fulfill. 5:18For most assuredly, I tell you, until heaven and earth pass away, not even one smallest letter or one tiny pen stroke shall in any way pass away from the law, until all things are accomplished. 5:19Whoever, therefore, shall break one of these least commandments, and teach others to do so, shall be called least in the Kingdom of Heaven; but whoever shall do and teach them shall be called great in the Kingdom of Heaven.

Seeing that Yah'shuah said, only a few moments before his comments in Matthew 5:31-32, that nothing would pass away from the law prior to the passing away of heaven and earth, the provisions of Deuteronomy 24:1-2 remain.

Deuteronomy 24:1-2 reads,

24:1When a man takes a wife, and marries her, then it shall be, if she find no favor in his eyes, because he has found some unseemly thing in her, that he shall write her a bill of divorce, and give it in her hand, and send her out of his house. 24:2When she is departed out of his house, she may go and be another man’s wife.

It should therefore be clear that the woman who has been divorced, evidenced by the bill of divorce she received from her husband at the time of divorce, can indeed marry again. A man who so marries such a divorced woman is not committing adultery.]

Why Adultery Is Deterred Against

Someone might ask: why should there be a deterrent against adultery? What is wrong with adultery, that it should be deterred against?

Adultery is a wife engaging in unlawful sexual conduct, that is a wife having sex with any entity other than her husband. By having sex with her husband a woman becomes one flesh with her husband, she becomes one with her husband.

Human Marriage Typifies The Messiah's And His Assembly's Marriage

Human marriage typifies the marriage between the Messiah and the assembly of called out ones, as shown in Ephesians 5: 22-33. In fact, the reason why human marriage exists is because of the planned existence of the marriage between the Messiah and the assembly of called out ones.

Ephesians 5:22-33 reads,

5:22Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 5:23For the husband is the head of the wife, and Christ also is the head of the assembly, being himself the savior of the body. 5:24But as the assembly is subject to Christ, so let the wives also be to their own husbands in everything.

5:25Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the assembly, and gave himself up for it; 5:26that he might sanctify it, having cleansed it by the washing of water with the word, 5:27that he might present the assembly to himself gloriously, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. 5:28Even so ought husbands also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself. 5:29For no man ever hated his own flesh; but nourishes and cherishes it, even as the Lord also the assembly; 5:30because we are members of his body, of his flesh and bones. 5:31"For this cause a man will leave his father and mother, and will be joined to his wife. The two will become one flesh." 5:32This mystery is great, but I speak in regard of Christ and of the assembly. 5:33Nevertheless each of you must also love his own wife even as himself; and let the wife see that she respects her husband.

In the marriage between the Messiah and the assembly, the Messiah is the husband, with the assembly being the wife, with each member of the assembly calling the Messiah his or her husband and master. For the members of the assembly are under the authority of the Messiah and are owned by the Messiah.

Spiritual Oneness In The Messiah's Assembly

By submitting to the Messiah the members of the assembly are spiritually one with the Messiah, even as stated in 1 Corinthians 6: 17, which reads

6:17But he who is joined to the Lord is one spirit.

But if a member of the assembly does not submit to the Messiah, not so submitting by serving or submitting to another entity, such a member ceases to be one with the Messiah spiritually. This rebellious behaviour is inconsistent with the planned order of conduct within the marriage of the Messiah and the assembly of called out ones. For by rebelling against the Messiah such an individual joins himself or herself to his or her new master or husband. This is not in Yahweh’s design for the marriage between the Messiah and the assembly, and is therefore unholy conduct, for it is not of Yahweh. By engaging in such unholy conduct, rebelling against the Messiah and therefore also against Yahweh’s word, such an individual becomes unholy and ceases to be spiritually one with the Messiah. And as the spiritual unity such an individual had with the Messiah has been ruptured, such a rebellious individual is put out of the assembly, for he has become unholy and is no longer spiritually one with the Messiah.

Rebels Cast Out From The Messiah's Assembly

This is why Yah'shuah spoke in the manner that he did in Matthew 5: 29-30, that if a member of your body causes you to sin, pluck it out, for it is better to attain to life with a dismembered body, than to remain whole and lose out on life altogether. And as the assembly of called out ones is the body of the Messiah, if a member of that body rebels from being under the Messiah, such a member must be put out of the assembly, lest the rebellion spread among other members of the assembly, thereby causing the entire assembly to lose out on everlasting life. For Yahweh and the Messiah are pure and holy, and irrevocably pure and holy, and will not pollute their purity and holiness by allowing unholiness to be spiritually one with them. And if the cost of maintaining this purity and holiness is the partial dismemberment, or even complete dismemberment, of the assembly of called out ones, then so be it. Nevertheless, it will not be the case that the assembly of called out ones will be completely dismembered, for already there are many who have died while being spiritually one with the Messiah, and there are yet to be many others who will become and remain spiritually one with the Messiah. But some rebels have already been dismembered, and those who become rebels in future will also be dismembered from the assembly of called out ones.

Why Adultery Is Wrong

Therefore, to recap, adultery is wrong because it portrays an erroneous and unholy picture of the marriage between the Messiah and the assembly of called out ones, the marriage that gives cause to the institution of human marriage. For had Yahweh not planned that a marriage exist between the Messiah and the assembly of called out ones, it is unlikely he would have instituted human marriage. For Yahweh created humans in his image and likeness. But it is not recorded that he created other living beings on earth in his image and likeness. And we do not see marriage in other living beings on earth, living beings that he created, but not in his image and likeness.

Human marriage is therefore a holy institution, founded on the spiritual marriage between the Messiah and the assembly of called out ones. Human marriage, being the representation or picture of the spiritual marriage between the Messiah and the assembly of called out ones, therefore ought to be kept holy, without pollutions and impurities being allowed to come into it. And adultery is such an impurity, polluting the holiness of human marriage. Adultery is therefore wrong!

Therefore, it is not in order for a wife to engage in adulterous conduct in order to procure a divorce from her husband, so that she may marry some other man. As such conduct is evil, the laws of Yahweh must deter against it.

There Is Only One Approved Spiritual Husband

For, in truth, apart from Yah'shuah the Messiah, there is no valid spiritual husband. For the ultimate authority in the entire universe, encompassing both the spiritual and physical realms, Yahweh, who is spiritually one with Yah'shuah the Messiah, has so determined that the only manner for any human to become spiritually one with him is by becoming spiritually one with Yah'shuah the Messiah. Those humans who refuse to become spiritually one with Yah'shuah the Messiah will simply be destroyed with an everlasting death, for there is no one else for them to go to by whom they may become spiritually one with Yahweh.

So also in human marriage. If a wife rebels and refuses to be one with her husband, by her adulterous conduct, she is to be cast out or divorced from her husband’s household and ought to then remain alone, without marrying another man. For just as, spiritually, an individual is not to submit to any entity other than that individual’s true and rightful husband, meaning Yah'shuah the Messiah, so also a woman is not to become wife to any man other than her rightful husband. And just as, spiritually, Yah'shuah the Messiah has authority over an individual as long as Yah'shuah the Messiah lives, so also the rightful husband has authority over his wife as long as he lives. If his wife engages in adulterous conduct and he divorces her, she ought not to marry some other man as long as his husband is alive, for an individual who rebels against the Messiah and is cast out of the assembly of called out ones is still required to submit to the authority of Yah'shuah the Messiah, even if and when that individual rebels against that authority. So also a wife who has rebelled against her husband and has been cast out by him is still required to submit to his husband’s authority, thereby precluding that wife from coming under the authority of another man as her husband. She may choose, in her continued rebellion, to reject this law, but it remains the law nevertheless!

[August 1999 View: Why Adultery Is Deterred Against.

Just as the Almighty does not authorise the spiritual marriage of an individual to any entity other than Christ, so also does he not authorise the marriage of a rebellious wife to any man not her rightful husband. A manner a husband can frustrate his rebellious wife's desire to lawfully marry another man is simply to put her away without divorcing her. For rebellious and unfaithful conduct by a wife is included in the Greek word 'porneia' translated in Matthew 5:31 as 'sexual immorality'. And the man who puts away his wife on any porneia ground does not do so unjustly. If his put away wife then commits adultery, he is not responsible for her adultery, seeing that he justly put her away, on account of her porneia.]

Can A Husband Annul The Divorce Of His Wife?

Is divorce permanent, or can a husband annul his divorce of his wife?

It appears that divorce that is valid before Yahweh is permanent, for no one - and this includes the divorcing husband - is allowed to marry a validly divorced woman.

If the divorcing husband desires to marry again, then he ought to marry another woman. But he must not marry the wife he has divorced, for no one is allowed to marry a validly divorced woman. She must bear her sin.

What if the woman repents of her adultery. Can she be taken back by her divorcing husband with Yahweh’s approval? Or is she to see out the rest of her days as a single woman?

It appears that no man is allowed to marry her, including her divorcing husband, for Yah'shuah said that whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery. Divorce is therefore a final non-revocable decision. Therefore, if the divorced wife repents, her lot is to serve Yahweh exclusively, without being joined in marriage to any man.

What about the gratification of her sexual urges?

She must then ask Yahweh to give her sufficient self-control to overcome her sexual urges and serve him wholeheartedly, that is, without the distractions of also serving a husband. And once she has come under the wings of Yahweh by her repentance, and asks Yahweh in faith for the gift of self-control, Yahweh will speedily give her this gift, for it is Yahweh’s desire that she lives a holy life.

The divorced repentant woman must note that her penalty of serving out the rest of her physical days as a single woman arose out of her previous adulterous conduct. Physically she must bear her sin. This is fundamentally no different to an arrested repentant thief still being required to serve a penalty for his or her theft. Nevertheless, a repentant sinner should also note that Yahweh, by his mercy and grace, forgives one’s sins, and therefore one’s standing with respect to one’s spiritual salvation is not in jeopardy. And it is the spiritual life that one ought to concern oneself with more than one’s physical life. For he who loves his life more than he loves Yah'shuah is not worthy of Yah'shuah the Messiah.

[August 1999 View: Can A Husband Annul The Divorce Of His Wife?

It should be noted again that many Bible translations wrongly render 'put away' in Matthew 5:32 as 'divorced'. The translation error has led to the above-described erroneous view!

To reiterate, a properly divorced woman can legally marry another man. A woman put away from her husband but not divorced is not allowed to marry another man.

Deuteronomy 24:1-4 reads,

24:1When a man takes a wife, and marries her, then it shall be, if she find no favor in his eyes, because he has found some unseemly thing in her, that he shall write her a bill of divorce, and give it in her hand, and send her out of his house. 24:2When she is departed out of his house, she may go and be another man’s wife. 24:3If the latter husband hate her, and write her a bill of divorce, and give it in her hand, and send her out of his house; or if the latter husband die, who took her to be his wife; 24:4her former husband, who sent her away, may not take her again to be his wife, after that she is defiled; for that is abomination before Yahweh: and you shall not cause the land to sin, which Yahweh your God gives you for an inheritance.

A woman's former husband is forbidden from taking her again as his wife AFTER she has been sexually defiled while divorced from him. But the Law does not forbid the former husband from taking her as his wife BEFORE she is sexually defiled while divorced from him. It therefore appears that a man can again take as his wife a woman previously his wife whom he divorced, provided she did not defile herself sexually while she was divorced from him.

A Man Can Marry Again A Woman Previously His Wife

Therefore, even though a man cannot revoke a divorce of his wife, he can again take the same woman as his wife if she has not been sexually defiled while divorced from him.

Yahweh Will Marry His Former Wife, The House Of Israel

Yahweh, in the book of Jeremiah, gives us an example from his own conduct affirming that a husband can indeed take as wife a woman previously his wife whom he had divorced. Jeremiah 31:31-34 reads,

31:31Behold, the days come, says Yahweh, that I will make a new covenant with the house of Israel, and with the house of Judah: 31:32not according to the covenant that I made with their fathers in the day that I took them by the hand to bring them out of the land of Egypt; which my covenant they broke, although I was a husband to them, says Yahweh. 31:33But this is the covenant that I will make with the house of Israel after those days, says Yahweh: I will put my law in their inward parts, and in their heart will I write it; and I will be their God, and they shall be my people: 31:34and they shall teach no more every man his neighbor, and every man his brother, saying, Know Yahweh; for they shall all know me, from the least of them to the greatest of them, says Yahweh: for I will forgive their iniquity, and their sin will I remember no more.

Yahweh, previously husband to the house of Israel, will again take the house of Israel as his wife. Yahweh therefore shows, from his conduct, that a husband can take again as his wife a woman formerly his wife, whom he had divorced. It therefore appears that if a husband is as merciful as Yahweh is, and the divorced woman is cleansed in her heart as the house of Israel will be, Yahweh having put his laws in her heart, he can indeed take her again as his wife.]

Why Divorce Is Permanent

Someone may ask: why should divorce be permanent even in the case of a repentant divorced wife? Should not mercy be allowed to prevail and the divorced wife allowed back into her husband’s household?

It appears to me that the moment a wife rebels from her husband and starts engaging in adulterous conduct, he should urge her to repent of her adulterous lifestyle and be willing to forgive her and accept her back into his household after she repents. But if, after being given due time to repent of her adultery, she persists in it, then the husband should definitely divorce her, especially if he is a believing husband. For the holy should not be united with the unholy. Also, her adulterous lifestyle totally despises the holy institution of marriage.

Spiritually, a rebellious member of the assembly of called out ones is put out of the assembly. If such a rebel repents of his rebellion, and seeks Yahweh’s forgiveness, Yahweh will forgive him and welcome him back into the assembly of called out ones. Nevertheless, if the rebellion involved blasphemy against the Holy Spirit of Yahweh, such a rebel will by no means be forgiven, for this is a sin that has no forgiveness either in this age or in the next. Therefore, when a member of the assembly of called out ones blasphemes against the Holy Spirit of Yahweh, such a member is cast out of the assembly of called out ones without the privilege of ever receiving forgiveness of one’s sin. One’s sin has the effect of permanently excluding one from ever being united to one’s previous master, Yah'shuah the Messiah, and therefore permanently excludes one from the assembly of called out ones.

Likewise, if a rebellious wife persists in her adultery, and refuses to repent, then her husband must divorce her, for she has both despised her husband and the holy institution of marriage, thereby also despising Yahweh. The permanence of her divorce from her husband while he lives is equated to the permanence of the exclusion from the assembly of called out ones of a rebel who has committed blasphemy against the Holy Spirit of Yahweh. There are some forms of conduct which bring about permanent lasting consequences!

[August 1999 View: Why Divorce Is Permanent.

As seen above from the accounts accompanying Deuteronomy 24:1-4 and Jeremiah 31:31-34, divorce is not necessarily permanent. The divorce that is permanent is that of a woman who becomes sexually defiled while divorced. Her former husband is not allowed to take her again as his wife.

Nevertheless, Yahweh in Jeremiah 3 shows that he will take again the house of Israel as his wife, despite having divorced her, and the house of Israel having spiritually defiled herself while divorced from him.

Why Yahweh Will Remarry The House Of Israel

Jeremiah 3:1 reads,

3:1They say, If a man put away his wife, and she go from him, and become another man’s, will he return to her again? Won’t that land be greatly polluted? But you have played the prostitute with many lovers; yet return again to me, says Yahweh.

In Jeremiah 3:20-22 Yahweh EXPLAINS why he is able to take again as his wife a woman who defiled herself sexually while divorced from him:

3:20Surely as a wife treacherously departs from her husband, so have you dealt treacherously with me, house of Israel, says Yahweh. 3:21A voice is heard on the bare heights, the weeping and the petitions of the children of Israel; because they have perverted their way, they have forgotten Yahweh their God. 3:22Return, you backsliding children, I will heal your backsliding. Behold, we are come to you; for you are Yahweh our God.

Yahweh shows that he will HEAL the house of Israel's backslidings. After the house of Israel is healed she will no longer be unclean or defiled, but cleansed or holy. She will then be able to become spiritually one with Yahweh, who is the epitome of purity and holiness.

Can A Man Remarry A Woman Sexually Defiled While Divorced From Him?

With respect to humans, a husband has no power of his own to heal a sexually defiled woman previously his wife. He therefore cannot take her again as his wife, for this would be a union of the holy and the unholy, which Yahweh forbids. But if Yahweh cleanses or heals her, such that she is no longer defiled, it seems to me, following Yahweh's example with the house of Israel, that the man may again take her as his wife. For then it will be a union of two holy people, rather than one between a holy person and a defiled person.

It therefore appears that divorce is not necessarily permanent!]

Things That Defile Men

Matthew 15:1-20 (Mark 7:1-23) reads,

15:1Then Pharisees and scribes came to Yah'shuah from Jerusalem, saying, 15:2"Why do your disciples disobey the tradition of the elders? For they don’t wash their hands when they eat bread."

15:3He answered them, "Why do you also disobey the commandment of God because of your tradition? 15:4For God commanded, ‘Honor your father and your mother,’ and, ‘He who speaks evil of father or mother, let him be put to death.’ 15:5But you say, ‘Whoever may tell his father or his mother, "Whatever help you might otherwise have gotten from me is a gift devoted to God," 15:6he shall not honor his father or mother.’ You have made the commandment of God void because of your tradition. 15:7You hypocrites! Well did Isaiah prophesy of you, saying,

15:8‘These people draw near to me with their mouth,
And honor me with their lips;
But their heart is far from me.

15:9But in vain do they worship me,
Teaching as doctrine rules made by men.’"

15:10He summoned the multitude, and said to them, "Hear, and understand. 15:11That which enters into the mouth doesn’t defile the man; but that which proceeds out of the mouth, this defiles the man."

15:12Then the disciples came, and said to him, "Do you know that the Pharisees were offended, when they heard this saying?"

15:13But he answered, "Every plant which my heavenly Father didn’t plant will be uprooted. 15:14Leave them alone. They are blind guides of the blind. If the blind guide the blind, both will fall into a pit."

15:15Peter answered him, "Explain the parable to us."

15:16So Yah'shuah said, "Do you also still not understand? 15:17Don’t you understand that whatever goes into the mouth passes into the belly, and then out of the body? 15:18But the things which proceed out of the mouth come out of the heart, and they defile the man. 15:19For out of the heart come forth evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, sexual sins, thefts, false testimony, and blasphemies. 15:20These are the things which defile the man; but to eat with unwashed hands doesn’t defile the man."

Included among the things that defile men are evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornications, thefts, false witness, blasphemies, covetousness, wickedness, deceit, lewdness, an evil eye, pride and foolishness.

Allowable Ground For Divorce

Matthew 19:1-12 (Mark 10:1-12; Luke 16:18) reads,

19:1It happened when Yah'shuah had finished these words, he departed from Galilee, and came into the borders of Judea beyond the Jordan. 19:2Great multitudes followed him, and he healed them there. 19:3Pharisees came to him, testing him, and saying, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any reason?"

19:4He answered, "Haven’t you read that he who made them from the beginning made them male and female, 19:5and said, ‘For this cause a man shall leave his father and mother, and shall join to his wife; and the two shall become one flesh?’ 19:6So that they are no more two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, don’t let man tear apart."

19:7They asked him, "Why then did Moses command us to give her a bill of divorce, and divorce her?"

19:8He said to them, "Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it has not been so. 19:9I tell you that whoever [puts away] his wife, except for sexual immorality [Gk. 'porneia'], and marries another, commits adultery; and he who marries her when she is [put away] commits adultery."

19:10His disciples said to him, "If this is the case of the man with his wife, it is not expedient to marry."

19:11But he said to them, "Not all men can receive this saying, but those to whom it is given. 19:12For there are eunuchs who were born that way from their mother’s womb, and there are eunuchs who were made eunuchs by men; and there are eunuchs who made themselves eunuchs for the Kingdom of Heaven’s sake. He who is able to receive it, let him receive it."

Marriage is for life, and it is the death of one of the parties to the marriage that ought to separate them from one another. Barring death of one of the parties, the only allowable reason for a man to divorce his wife is if she commits adultery or other sexual immorality.

How A Man Commits Adultery In The Spirit

A man commits adultery against his wife when he divorces her on a ground other than sexual immorality, and marries another. By unjustly divorcing her, even if he does not marry another, it appears to me that he still causes her to commit adultery, for he is placing her in a position whereby she is likely to commit adultery. Therefore, taking the spirit of the law, by unjustly divorcing her, whether or not he marries another woman, he has already committed adultery, for he has placed her in a position whereby she is likely to commit adultery.

On this basis, it appears to me that a husband should never separate his wife from himself if she has not committed adultery against him. For it is the act of not satisfying her sexual desires that places her in a position whereby she is likely to commit adultery, not just the putting her away out of his house. Therefore, even if a husband is still living with his wife in the same house, but denies himself from her sexually, he is placing his wife in a position whereby she is likely to commit adultery, and therefore, by his sexual denial conduct, he is committing adultery against her - applying the spirit of the law against adultery. It is therefore imperative upon the husband that he always satisfies the sexual desires of any woman who is his wife.

In a polygynous context, this automatically limits a husband to the number of wives that he can appropriately cope with, with respect to satisfying their sexual desires. If a man can satisfy the sexual desires of only one wife, he should not marry another. If he can satisfy more, then he should limit himself to no more than those he can properly satisfy sexually.

Can A Wife Divorce Her Husband?

A wife who separates herself from her husband and marries another commits adultery. This clearly implies that she has no power or authority from Yahweh to validly divorce or separate herself from her husband. She is her husband’s until either she or her husband dies, or when her husband divorces her. Then she is freed from her husband.

Even if her husband has committed adultery against her, she is still not to divorce her husband and marry another. For it is by so divorcing her husband and marrying another that she commits adultery, for her action in divorcing her husband is not recognised by Yahweh, for, in Yahweh’s eyes, she still belongs to her husband.

Does The Wife Who Separates Herself From Her Husband, Yet Does Not Remarry, Commit Adultery?

Would a wife who separates herself from her husband, yet does not marry another man, be committing adultery?

It might appear, on the surface, that the wife would not be committing adultery. She might appear guilty of insurbodination against her husband for separating herself from him against his will. And if she separates herself from him without his objection, then she might appear not to be guilty even of insurbodination.

Nevertheless, Yah'shuah emphatically stated that what Yahweh has joined together, let no man separate! This includes both husband and wife.

Therefore, once married, a husband and wife should not separate, even if the wife desires to do so and the husband is not objecting.

Also, by the wife living her life separately from her husband, she will indeed by placing herself in a position whereby she will be more likely to commit adultery. And a husband who allows, either actively or passively, his wife to live in such a condition, causes his wife to commit adultery, and therefore he commits adultery - applying the spirit of the law against adultery. There is therefore an obligation on the husband to ensure that any wife of his is not in a situation whereby she is likely to commit adultery. There is therefore an obligation on him to ensure that he regularly satisfies the sexual desires of any wife of his, thereby ensuring that no wife of his is in a situation whereby she is likely to commit adultery.

It should therefore be clear that a wife who separates herself from her husband, yet does not marry another man, breaches the spirit of the law against adultery. For she goes against Yah'shuah’s words that whatever Yahweh has joined together, let no man put asunder. Therefore, a wife who separates herself from her husband commits adultery, irrespective of whether or not she marries another man!

Why Adulterers And Adulteresses Are Not Allowed To Marry Again

There is another issue that needs to be examined. Yah'shuah stated that a man commits adultery against his wife when he unjustly puts her away on a ground other than her engaging in sexual immorality and marries another (Mark 10: 11; Luke 16: 18). As a man has already committed adultery by his action in unjustly putting away his wife on a ground other than her engaging in sexual immorality, what is the import of Yah'shuah’s words that a man commits adultery by marrying another woman after putting away his wife on a ground other than her engaging in sexual immorality?

Mark 10:11 reads,

10:11He said to them, "Whoever [puts away] his wife, and marries another, commits adultery against her.

Luke 16:18 reads,

16:18Everyone who [puts away] his wife, and marries another, commits adultery. He who marries one who is [put away] from a husband commits adultery.

If a man has already committed adultery by wrongfully putting away his wife, and is also termed by Yah'shuah as committing adultery by subsequently marrying another woman, then it must be that Yahweh bars any adulterer from subsequently marrying again! For why should an adulterer enter into a new marriage when he is already violating his existing one, thereby not only defiling the existing marriage, but also Yahweh’s word? Is not the adulterer likely to so defile the new marriage also, thereby compounding on his defilement of that which is holy?

The rightfully put away woman, because she has committed adultery, is barred from marrying again. And the wrongfully putting away man, because his wife has not committed adultery, and he, by his wrongful putting away, has committed adultery, is barred from marrying again. Therefore it is seen that anyone, whether husband or wife, who commits adultery, is barred from marrying again. There is no partiality with Yahweh!

Spiritually, this scenario would play itself out if the Messiah, the husband of the assembly of called out ones, broke faith with them by separating himself from them when they are not defiled or unholy. If such were to happen Yahweh would not allow the Messiah to enter into spiritual marriage subsequently with anyone else. Fortunately, our husband the Messiah is true and faithful, and will always be so. He will never abandon those whom Yahweh has called out and given to him. The scenario is therefore hypothetical, as it will never happen that the Messiah will abandon those whom Yahweh has called out and given to him.

[August 1999 View: Why Adulterers And Adulteress Are Not Allowed To Marry Again.

A man commits adultery by unjustly putting away his wife, for he places her in a situation whereby she may commit adultery. It is immaterial whether or not he marries another.

A man who marries another woman without putting away his existing wife does not commit adultery against the existing wife. It therefore appears that any adultery the man commits is not centred on the additional wife.

It would therefore seem that a man who unjustly puts away his wife, and replaces her with another one, is cementing the situation of placing his put away wife in an adulterous situation. For by replacing her with another wife he is telling her that he is no longer willing to be reconciled with her. Thereby encouraging her to seek sexual gratification elsewhere. And it is in this process of her having sex with another that she commits adultery.

It therefore appears that there is no prohibition on an adulterer marrying another woman. Only that he should repent of his adultery against his estranged wife, by receiving her back into his house.]

How The Law Against Adultery Impacts On Polygyny

In the context of polygyny, a husband must make sure that he fulfils the sexual desires of all of his wives. If he sexually neglects even one wife of his, he will be committing adultery against this sexually neglected wife, for he will be placing her in a situation whereby she is likely to commit adultery. This is an application of the spirit of the law against adultery. If he marries another wife, while the sexually neglected wife is still in that state of sexual neglect, he will be compounding on his committing of adultery against the sexually neglected wife. A husband must therefore never sexually neglect any wife of his!

Therefore, any man contemplating marrying another wife, must ensure that he is not committing adultery against any wife of his by showing sexual neglect to any wife of his. For it is the sexual neglect of any wife of his that makes him an adulterer.

Also, even if a married man is not committing adultery against any wife of his, and contemplates marrying another, he must weigh up whether he would still remain capable of giving each wife of his due sexual attention. For if it is probable that any wife of his would become sexually neglected after his marriage to an additional wife, he should forestall going ahead with his contemplated marriage. For it will be better to avoid placing himself in a situation whereby he would become an adulterer, even if not in the letter, but so in the spirit of the law against adultery.

The application of the law against adultery should serve to limit men from marrying additional wives without giving due consideration to each wife they have. For if sufficient consideration - love - is not given to each wife a man has, a man will find himself to be an adulterer, occasioned by his sexual neglect of any wife of his. The ramifications of the law against adultery are far and wide. Only men capable of so giving due sexual attention to each wife of theirs, in addition to any they contemplate marrying, should contemplate marrying an additional wife. If a man is not so capable, he should not marry an additional wife.

How A Woman Commits Adultery

Romans 7:3 reads,

7:3So then if, while the husband lives, she is joined to another man, she would be called an adulteress. But if the husband dies, she is free from the law, so that she is no adulteress, though she is joined to another man.

A woman who marries another man while her husband is still alive commits adultery, and by her continual committing of adultery is an adulteress.

This verse prohibits a woman from marrying another man while her husband is alive, as she is still under the authority of her husband. It does not prohibit a man from marrying another unmarried woman while a wife of his is alive, for the man is not under the authority of any of his wives. Therefore, a married man who marries another unmarried woman does not commit adultery and is therefore not an adulterer.

The Unrighteous Include Adulterers

1 Corinthians 6:9-10 reads,

6:9Or don’t you know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Don’t be deceived. Neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor male prostitutes, nor homosexuals, 6:10nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor slanderers, nor extortioners, will inherit the kingdom of God.

The unrighteous, including fornicators, idolaters, adulterers, homosexuals, sodomites, thieves, covetous, drunkards, revilers and extortioners, will not inherit the kingdom of Yahweh.

The Works Of The Flesh

Galatians 5:16-26 reads,

5:16But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you won’t fulfill the lust of the flesh. 5:17For the flesh lusts against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh; and these are contrary the one to the other, that you may not do the things that you desire. 5:18But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law. 5:19Now the works of the flesh are obvious, which are: adultery, sexual immorality, uncleanness, lustfulness, 5:20idolatry, sorcery, hatred, strife, jealousies, outbursts of anger, rivalries, divisions, heresies, 5:21envyings, murders, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these; of which I forewarn you, even as I also forewarned you, that those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God.

5:22But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 5:23gentleness, and self-control. Against such things there is no law. 5:24Those who belong to Christ have crucified the flesh with its passions and lusts. 5:25If we live by the Spirit, let’s also walk by the Spirit. 5:26Let’s not become conceited, provoking one another, and envying one another.

We ought to walk in the Spirit and not in the lusts of the flesh, for these are contrary to one another.

With respect to polygyny, some works of the flesh that need to be guarded against are contentions, jealousies and envy.

Sex Within Marriage Is Holy

Hebrews 13:4 reads,

13:4Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the bed be undefiled: but God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterers.

As marriage is honourable and the marriage bed undefiled, there is nothing wrong with sex within marriage. But those who defile the marriage bed, adulterers and adulteresses, and those who engage in sex outside marriage, fornicators, Yahweh will judge.

James Addresses Those Committing Adultery

James 4:1-6 reads,

4:1Where do wars and fightings among you come from? Don’t they come from your pleasures that war in your members? 4:2You lust, and don’t have. You kill, covet, and can’t obtain. You fight and make war. Yet you don’t have, because you don’t ask. 4:3You ask, and don’t receive, because you ask amiss, so that you may spend it for your pleasures. 4:4You adulterers and adulteresses, don’t you know that friendship with the world is enmity with God? Whoever therefore wants to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God. 4:5Or do you think that the Scripture says in vain, "The Spirit who lives in us yearns jealously"? 4:6But he gives more grace. Therefore it says, "God resists the proud, but gives grace to the humble."

Verse 4 shows that those being addressed included those who were married, but were dishonouring their marriages and defiling their marriage beds. Adultery, the defiling of the marriage bed, is friendship with the world and enmity with Yahweh.

Desiring An Additional Wife To Gratify One’s Pleasures

If polygyny is scripturally valid, as it appears to be, then these verses offer advice to men who might be contemplating having an additional wife. Wars and fights do arise within marriages, and therefore these verses are appropriately applied to the marriage context.

According to verse 1 the wars and fights within marriages come from the desires for pleasure that war in the members of the marriage partners. A man may lust after another woman not his wife, probably someone else’s wife. If such a man asks to be given such a woman he will not be so given, for such a man would be asking amiss, for the woman is already someone else’s wife. Also, if the sole reason for the man asking for another wife, even an unmarried woman, is to satisfy his pleasures, he will not be so given this additional wife. For an additional wife ought to be given to one for a purpose greater than just the provision of pleasure. And if all that one lives for is the satisfaction of his pleasures, then this one is really a friend of the world, and therefore an enemy of Yahweh. For there is more to our lives than just the gratification of our pleasures. Therefore, an additional wife, if one is sought, should be sought for a purpose greater than the gratification of pleasure.

Likewise, a wife should not ask to be given another man who is not her husband. For she is already married to her husband. And even if there is some difficulty or impossibility in her husband providing her with pleasure, and all she desires in another man is the receipt of pleasure her husband is not providing her with, she will still not be given this man she asks for, if she does indeed ask for such a man. For the receipt of pleasure is not sufficient reason for a woman to be granted another man aside from her husband, and such a woman, by setting her mind on pleasure, is a friend of the world and an enemy of Yahweh.

The pursuit of pleasure for its own sake is friendship with the world and enmity with Yahweh. Therefore, if a man desires another wife purely for pleasure, he makes himself a friend of the world and therefore an enemy of Yahweh. Yahweh is unlikely to bless such a marriage, even if, of itself, it does not violate his word. What violates his word is the man making the pursuit of pleasure in his life more important than other matters, and specifically, more important than Yahweh himself. For he who pursues pleasure first and foremost makes this pursuit of pleasure his god or deity, to the diminishing of his service to Yahweh. And as man cannot serve two masters at the same time, such a man would be serving the gratification of his pleasure first and foremost, and therefore not serving Yahweh. Such a man would be committing spiritual adultery, for he would have given himself over to a deity other than Yahweh. And by desiring that which should not be desired, that is the gratification of pleasure rather than the worship of Yahweh, such a man would also be committing covetousness. It is therefore seen in this case that the man would be committing idolatry, adultery and covetousness by his wrongful desire of an additional wife - purely for the gratification of his pleasures.

Repenting Of Adultery

In light of the above scriptures and comments, there is an important practical matter that has to be dealt with. All who submit to Yahweh and to Yah'shuah the Messiah are not adulterers. And those who desire to so submit must also not be adulterers, and if they are, they must cease from their adultery. For it is only those who are not adulterers who may be spiritually one with both Yahweh and Yah'shuah the Messiah, being sanctified, even as both Yahweh and Yah'shuah the Messiah are holy. It is these who are holy, who do not practice adultery, who will inherit the kingdom of Yahweh.

Therefore, if a man is an adulterer by virtue of having put away a wife of his on a ground other than sexual immorality, he must take back that wife into his household and duly satisfy her sexual desires without denying her this. If a man is an adulterer by virtue of having placed his wife in a situation whereby she is likely to commit adultery, such as by denying her satisfaction of her sexual desires, even if he has not yet cast her out of his household, he must cease to so deny his wife and give her due sexual satisfaction.

Also, a wife who is an adulteress, by virtue of living with a man other than her husband as man and wife, or by virtue of engaging in harlotry, with or without receipt of payment, must also cease from so having sex with any man who is not her husband. She must return to her husband and ask to be forgiven and taken back into his household. And if her husband has put her away, she must still not have sex with any man who is not her husband. She must spend the remaining days of her physical life as a single woman, devoting herself to serving Yah'shuah the Messiah. For a woman the wife of a man is not allowed to marry another.

Patience In Marriage

It should therefore be clear that it does indeed take a man to wrongfully put away his wife for him to become an adulterer. He can also become an adulterer by his conduct in denying his wife due sexual satisfaction, thereby placing her in a situation whereby she is likely to commit adultery. He might resort to denying his wife due sexual satisfaction because his wife may have displeased him, and may still be displeasing him, on some non-sexual immorality matter, such as by her not submitting to him. Nevertheless, even if a man’s wife continually displeases him on any matter excluding her committing sexual immorality [Gk. 'porneia'], the man is not to commit adultery against her, either by putting her away, or by denying her due sexual satisfaction. The man must remain patient or longsuffering in his displeasure with his wife’s conduct, and must continually overcome his displeasure and continually give his wife due sexual satisfaction.

It is in this light that Yah'shuah’s disciples remarked, in Matthew 19:10, that if such was the case between a man and his wife, then it was expedient not to marry. For they realised that it required great strength of character for a man to remain faithful to his wife even when his wife was engaging herself in conduct displeasing to him, even if such conduct did not include her committing sexual immorality. Yah'shuah did not dispute his disciples comments when he responded by stating that not all could accept the teaching, except those to whom it was given, that one should remain single, that is not marry, for the sake of the kingdom of Yahweh.

Being Unmarried

For marriage does indeed have its challenges. The husband must properly cope with all of the weaknesses of any wife of his, including all of the weaknesses of all his wives if he has more than one, yet remain faithful to Yahweh’s word, including his law against adultery. Also, the wife must remain faithful to her husband, and to Yahweh, despite all of her husband’s weaknesses. These challenges to both husband and wife, which come with marriage, make it difficult for each of them to continue to remain faithful to all of Yahweh’s laws. Nevertheless, remain faithful to all of Yahweh’s laws they must.

It is in this light that the apostle Paul remarked in 1 Corinthians 7 that it was good for one to remain single and not marry. For by being single one can give both Yahweh and Yah'shuah the Messiah undivided service, for such service would not be divided by other service to one’s wife or husband. For marriage does indeed have its challenges and these challenges do distract one from service to both Yahweh and Yah'shuah. Nevertheless, Paul also realised that being single was a gift that not all had, for Yah'shuah stated clearly that only those who were given this gift could properly live single lives. Those without the gift of properly living single lives must, out of the need to avoid violating Yahweh’s word, marry, despite its attendant challenges and distractions from wholly serving Yahweh and Yah'shuah the Messiah.

Compounded Difficulties Within Polygyny In Service To Yahweh

In this context, any man contemplating marrying an additional wife, should take the above comments into due consideration. For the challenges brought to one’s life, vis-à-vis faithful service to Yahweh and Yah'shuah the Messiah while at the same time being married, are already great enough with one wife. By marrying another wife one is making the task of faithfully serving both Yahweh and Yah'shuah the Messiah increasingly more difficult, due to the attendant additional distracting challenges in serving all of one’s household while at the same time faithfully serving both Yahweh and Yah'shuah the Messiah.

It is therefore my opinion, that before one marries an additional wife, one should properly weigh the cost, both spiritual and physical, of this contemplated action. And if one correctly assesses that by so marrying an additional wife there will be comparative loss in his service to Yahweh and Yah'shuah the Messiah, then it would be better to refrain from so marrying an additional wife. In other words, while it would not be against Yahweh’s law to marry an additional wife, it would be better not to marry an additional wife, in order not to compromise the degree of service one gives to Yahweh and to Yah'shuah the Messiah. Yahweh has given discretion in the matter of a man taking an additional wife, and the man had better use this discretion wisely. On the other hand, if one correctly assesses that by so marrying an additional wife there will be comparative improvement in his service to Yahweh and Yah'shuah the Messiah, then it would be better to marry an additional wife. A key consideration in this matter would therefore be the enhancement or detraction of service to Yahweh and Yah'shuah the Messiah by marrying an additional wife.


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